It’s Not Ok, They Do Not Understand.

    At one time or another, one of the children we work with does something inappropriate to another person and they respond, “That’s ok, I understand.” Do not let that slide.  They do not understand.  If they understood, they would take the time to stay there and role play the appropriate response with the child.  A disability is not a get out of jail free card.  What might seem like cute behavior now will not be so cute two to five years down the road.  If it is not appropriate now it will not become appropriate later.  It is important to correct these behaviors as they come and to educate those who come into contact with our students on a daily basis not to accept inappropriate behavior.

   Personal space is very important in our society.  If you get too close to someone, they feel uncomfortable.  Children with sensory issues may reach out and touch people looking for sensory input.  It is important to teach our children when and where it is appropriate to do this.  There are other ways to get this sensory input in public places that is appropriate for older children and this needs to be taught.  Your OT can help give you some ideas.  One thing I teach is to pull the arms of a sweatshirt tight around themselves.  Another sensory issue arises when giving a high five.  Some kids will do so with great force.  This is not ok.  A consequence should be given if the behavior continues after giving a warning, and appropriate pressure should be practiced.  It is important that new appropriate behavior be taught in a positive way.  The first couple of times the behavior occurs, explain to the child that they are not in trouble, you are just teaching.  Once they know the behavior and then choose to not use it then you can decide to use consequences.

  Children with special needs grow up to be adults with special needs.  What is cute and endearing as a child makes them stand out and be needier as an adult. As teachers and parents it is important to start looking at our children with an eye on their future.  How will the world see them once they are out of school?  Do we want the world to see them as little children, dependent on those around them with a lack of social skills and etiquette, or do we want the world to see them as adult with disabilities doing amazing things in the world? If we want the latter, we have to begin teaching them early and not allowing others to say, “That’s ok, I understand.” 

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