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No matter if you
are parent or teacher of the year, melt downs are going to happen from time to
time. I will talk about what to with the
kids in another blog. Today, I want to
talk about us, the adults in charge of the
chaos that is going on? I have two
things I want you to keep in mind at all times: 1. it is not aimed at you, not
really 2. two always try to find the
humor in the situation. Keeping things as
light as possible will keep the stress level down and everyone as calm as
possible.
Whatever is
happening always remember it is not you that is the problem, it is the
situation, Do not get caught up in a
power struggle or be offended and hurt by what is going on. The child in a meltdown has lost control and
you are the one who is there to help guide them back into control. An “I hate you” or other such nonsense said
in the heat of a meltdown is just verbal vomit.
Think of it as that. The child is
on over load and is literally vomiting up emotions that are coming out all
mixed up and jumbled. They make no
sense. The I hate you could be the hate
from the “I hate the way I feel” and the you from “ I wish you would help me.” Do not take it personally or confuse the issue
more by getting your own feelings involved.
Take a deep breath and remind yourself, the child is upset and does not
mean what is being said. It is verbal vomit.
Always try to see
the humor in things. I do not mean to
laugh at the child. These children are
in pain. It is possible, though, to try to find humor in most situations. Some of the
things that are occurring are humorous.
I sit with my gown children and we laugh at the silly antics that they
pulled as children. My oldest ran around
a planter and had me chase her until a neighbor cut her off when she was
3. We laugh about that. I wish I had laughed then. When your child
tries the same routine for the 50th time and you sit there calmly
and they make that face like “not this again,” go ahead and giggle inside. It will relieve your stress and help you
handle the rest better.
When the meltdown is
done, take some time to walk away and re-energize. If you are in a classroom, get someone to
cover while you take a lap around the halls.
At home, if no one else is there, find a quiet room for a couple
minutes. You can read a book, walk on a
treadmill, or call a friend. The
important thing is to take care of you.
A meltdown takes it out of everyone concerned. Do not feel bad if your plans for the day get
tossed out the window. Everything will
be there tomorrow. It always is.
Dealing day in and
day out with the challenges of special needs kids is stressful. There are so
many things you have to be in tune to at any given time. No one could possibly be expected to be
perfect and do it 100% all the time. So
cut yourself a little slack. As long as
you are doing your personal best and your heart is in the right place your kids
will thrive. Do not forget to take care
of yourself or there will not be anything left to give to the kids.
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