Tired of Always Being the Enforcer?

                Some days I get tired of being the mean one. I would love to turn a blind eye to behaviors in class and just let them go.  Is it really hurting anyone?  I stop and think, yes, I would be hurting my student by not teaching them the independence they deserve or the socially skills to be accepted by their peers.  So I suck it up put on my big girl pants and become the corrector of behavior, the enforcer of independence, the TEACHER! 

                Being a caregiver or teacher of a special needs child is an exhausting job.  There is no down time when you can say I’m tired let’s just put on a movie and pass out snacks.  I won’t have to do anything then.  Let’s go over all the lessons that have to be reinforced during this down time event: personal space, hands to yourself, quiet during a movie, assistance with snack packages, assistance with choosing snacks, proper eating (mouth closed, no slurping), restroom breaks, proper way to address someone who is bothering you, proper way to respond to someone who asks you to stop something that is bothering them, to name a few.  There are positive ways to do all of this: by praising those who are doing things correctly, thanking a student when they do it correctly etc, but it is still a constant teaching moment.  There are times when it can feel overwhelming, and then you see it, your student who never  walked around a conversation and always walked right between people talking, he walks around two teachers talking all on his own and you cry.  You know it is all worth it.

                Our job is so much more than reading, writing, and arithmetic. Our job is to help our students in every facet of their life become as independent and socially accepted as possible.  We hear about the wonderful people and organizations who reach out to our kids. and I am so thank full for them, but we have to do our part to teach our kids to come as far as they can to meet them in the middle.  For some eating with their mouth closed may not be possible, but for many it is. It just takes time to be reinforced and think how much better their life will be if they do.  How many more people in the work place will want to eat with them.   Teaching students how to take turns and how to not always be the winner will give them the ability as adults to have full social lives.  The simple act of covering a sneeze and using a tissue makes it so people do not walk away from you.  While these tiny things are easy to over  look they are the things that will make our kids accepted or not as adults.  One thing I try to keep in mind is what is cute now or accepted now, will it be as an adult?  If the answer is no. then it is not acceptable now.  I cannot reinforce something now that will not be acceptable later because it is so much harder to unlearn later. 

  So while I may get tire of being the bad guy from time to time,  I try to remember my young man  simply walked around a conversation on his on, or my young lady who can now ask for help on her own when she couldn't before. Or a multitude of other firsts and then I pull up my big girl pants an move on.